Ah Cyber Week, where the deals keep comin’. Aside from all the holiday shopping it is a good time to replace things that need replacing. For those that have a janky toaster oven spewing smoke in the kitchen, it might be a sign it’s time to replace it with a new one. And if it has gone that long where the thing has turned into a fire hazard (tip: empty the crumb tray!), then a bells-and-whistles model probably isn’t appropriate. For a no-nonsense model at a cheap price, check out the Cooks Essentials Stainless Steel Design Toaster Oven. It can bake, broil and make toast: check it off the list. Even if it wasn’t exactly on the list. How’s that for efficient holiday shopping?

Dallas is hosting the Super Bowl this year, but the Cowboys won’t be on the field. For some reason all the sports pundits pegged them as champions before the 2010 season started, but with a 1-7 start job security is more of an issue. While this may not bode well for ‘America’s Team’, their losses are your win, because toast is part of a complete breakfast. It seems like the rest of the NFL is having the Dallas Cowboys for breakfast, and now with the Pangea Dallas Cowboys Protoast Toaster you can too.

When you’re in the market for a hot dog toaster, it’s important to keep it classy. Actually, it’s not very hard to do; what kitchen décor isn’t improved with the addition of a hot dog-making appliance? Why none, of course.

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Morning is the one time of the day best served on automatic. From timed coffee makers to toaster-ovens that deliver perfectly browned toast, bagels or pastries, breakfast probably is the last meal that anyone wants to pay any attention to while actually making it. Still, I can’t help being drawn to the MoMA Stovetop Toaster.

Looking somewhat like a rectangular un-popped Jiffy Pop container, the handheld toaster is meant to be used on a gas or electric range. Place a slice of bread on top of the gridded side and set it on the burner. It might not be the most precise of kitchen gadgets, but for only eight bucks, it won’t cost a lot to find out just how asleep you really are in the morning while making breakfast.

Toasters tend to be rather stationary devices: you find a place for one on the counter, and then just let it be. Features that are more often seen in the more mobile of appliances rarely make it to the toaster. Appliances like food processors and blenders are the appliances that generally benefit from space-saving features like retractable power cords; when stored in the cupboard the power cords don’t get in the way. Toasters however, this doesn’t come into play as much. But that doesn’t mean that the retractable cord toaster doesn’t exist.

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It was a particularly cruel day in marketing hell when they decided to convince the masses that ‘mini’ was a desirable quality in products. It was probably the backlash against super-sizing that caused the word ‘mini’ to be applied to all things food-related, so considering those fast-food origins it’s not a total loss. Paying the same price (or sometimes more) for less is not desirable, yet somehow the evil genius horde has convinced us otherwise. As in all marketing coups, there is a (chicken) nugget of truth; a little restraint can be a good thing–not so much when attached to kitchen appliances however.

The Super Mini Toaster Oven may at first look appealing, but judging by the inclusion of a 6.25-inch sq. cooking pan, the kitchen appliance would be annoying more than anything else. It’s more Easy-Bake oven than toaster oven. While it features the “capabilities of a regular toaster oven with a 150°-450°F range in temperature, variable toasting function, 15 minute timer and “stay on” warming function”, I just can’t get over the fact that only one slice of bread at a time will fit in the thing. Even a regular slice of bread measures about 4 or 5 inches, and yes, I checked—and then made a Dagwood sandwich.